direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
i drank out of a bidet.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
