alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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