So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
