Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
