Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
