I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
