Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
