did you get engaged???
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
