We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Randomize
