why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
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