I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize
