Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
