You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Randomize
