i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Randomize