omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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