haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Mom said you looked used
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
She has the best kind of daddy issues
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