She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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