I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
