Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
