We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Randomize