I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
