All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
