oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
