Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
