No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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