haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize