just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
