Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
