just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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