This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Randomize
