he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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