ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
