i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
