I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
this is an emotional support booty call
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize
