This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize