What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize