She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
