His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
