so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
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