There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
My legs feel like baby dolphins
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
