I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize
