would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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