I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Randomize
