me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
