Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
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