That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
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