Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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