And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
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