Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
then he tried to convert me to islam
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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