I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
